The following is a snippet from my eBook, How To Write A Killer Oral Presentation. It's filled with unique advice that takes you from start to finish in mimicking the techniques used by a perfect-scorer VCE Year 12 student.

This blog covers the first step within Pillar 2: Writing The ‘This Is-Going-To-Blow-You-Away’ Speech.

Once you've chosen an interesting topic and have researched all of its different viewpoints, it's time to formulate your contention.

Often, creating a killer contention is about avoiding some common traps that will make your overall presentation boring, bland and just like the rest of your cohorts'.

So, I like to avoid:‍

Broad, overarching statements

If you think your contention is, ‘abortion in Australia’ then you’re wrong. This is simply not a contention! A contention is an opinion. The example, ‘abortion in Australia’ offers no insight into your opinion on the issue at all. Instead, ‘We need to consider women’s mental health when judging their decision on abortion’ is an opinion.‍

A contention that is just plain obvious

Let’s say we use the issue of ‘homelessness in Australia’. Arguing ‘homelessness in Australia is a problem’ or ‘we need to fix the homelessness issue in Australia’ just isn’t going to cut it because you’d never argue the opposite, ‘homelessness is great’. There are no differing viewpoints against your contention which means that you have nothing to argue against.

You need to be more specific with your issue - that’s why you looked up all those viewpoints in your research. For example, you could contend, ‘We need to fix the problems in homes in order to fix Australia’s homeless issue.’ This does has varied viewpoints because someone else’s solution could be to give homeless people greater access to help.

TEST: Before you move on to writing structure, ask yourself, can people argue against my contention? If yes, proceed ahead! If no, you’ll need to revise your contention again. Do this over and over until you can confidently answer ‘yes’ to the above question.

Avoid a contention that is generally accepted as true in today’s age ‍

When climate change first came onto the radar, the main debate was whether it was a real or a conspiracy theory. These discussions were in full force over 5+ years ago. These days (with the exception of climate change skeptics of course), discussion on climate change revolves more heavily around the slow pace of policy implementation, intergenerational effects of climate change, and mental health surrounding climate change.

Rather than arguing, ‘Climate change is real?’ (which your teacher has probably listened to a dozen times), you’re better suited to argue ‘Young people, not governments, should lead the fight against climate change’. Not only does this tie into the LSG belief that you should be more specific with your issue, it’ll also mean that your contention is relevant to today.

Now it's your turn. Give it a go! You might need to take a few tries to get your contention right, and that's absolutely OK.

If even after that you’re still unsure about your contention, make it a priority to speak to your teacher about it. Ask them if they could review your proposed contention and offer you any constructive feedback. Heck, even if you are confident with your contention, I’d ask your teacher anyway for any insight you mightn’t have thought of.

Wondering where to go from here? Well, luckily, my eBook, How To Write A Killer Oral Presentation, details my exact step-by-step process so you can get that A+ in your SAC this year.

• Access a step-by-step guide on how to write your Oral Presentation with simple, easy-to-follow advice
• Read and analyse sample A+ Oral Presentations with EVERY speech annotated and broken down on HOW and WHY students achieved A+ so you reach your goal
• Learn how to stand out from other students with advice on your speech delivery

Sounds like something that'd help you? I think so too! Access the full eBook by clicking here!

‍

Nine Days is currently studied in VCE English under Area of Study 1 - Text Response. For a detailed guide on Text Response, check out our Ultimate Guide to VCE Text Response.

Study Guide Contents:

1. Summary

2. Main Characters

3. Themes, Ideas and Values

4. Literary Devices

5. Essay Topics  

‍

1. Summary  

Jordan’s novel traces the tumultuous lives of the Westaway family and their neighbours through four generations as they struggle through World War II (1939-45), the postwar period of the late 1940s and 50s, the 1990s and the early 2000s. Composed of nine chapters and subsequently nine unique perspectives of life, their family home in Rowena Parade, Richmond, becomes the focal point for Jordan’s exploration of femininity, masculinity, family and Australian society. ‍

2. Main Characters

Kip Westaway

“Mr. Husting always says first impressions count” (p.5)

“Mr. Husting holds his other hand out flat and instead of an apple there’s a shilling.” (p.6)

“I own the lanes, mostly. I know the web of them, every lane in Richmond.” (p.21)

“When they put me in the grave, I know what it’ll say on the stone, if I get a stone, if they don’t bury me like a stray cat at the tip” (p.29)

“I didn’t say goodbye to Dad! On account of a book.” (p.158)

“This photo won’t be out of my sight from now on. You’ve given me my sister back, Alec.” (p.260)

Francis Westaway

“THE SHADOW CANNOT BE DEFEATED!” (p.145)

“The toughest gang in Richmond! And they want me, Francis Westaway!” (p.155)

“I see a purple jewel hanging on a gold chain. It’s a beaut, the prettiest thing I’ve ever seen… There’s no way I’m sharing this. It’s mine.” (p.174)

“Do you understand how sensitive a reputation id? It’s up to me to be respectable. I’m the eldest. It’s my responsibility.” (p.200)  

Connie Westaway

“Ma sitting with her dress lifted up to her face, Connie on her knees beside her, holding her arms, cooing soft like Ma is a baby.” (Kip, p.35)

“We women do what’s expected. You [men] can do almost anything you care to think of.” (p.280)

“It seems that all my life I’ve had nothing I’ve desired and I’ve given up having desire at all. Now I know what it feels like to want and I will give anything to have it (p.285)

“I thought we’d have more time than this. We’ve only just made it.” (p.290)  

Jean Westaway

“Those moments, when [Kip] reminds me of Tom. I have to leave the room. The fury rises up my legs and up my body like a scream and it’s all I can do not to let it out.” (p.212)

“We all die alone” (p.212)

“This is not how I imagined it to be. Children. Mothering.” (p.212)

“And for things like this, for girls like Connie and saving her future, there is a respectable woman who runs a business in Victoria Street” (pp.221-222)

“I’d never of done it with boys but Connie, she was different.” (p.239)

“we’re respectable people.” (p.218)

Tom Westaway

‘Kipper’s old man … dropped off the tram in Swan Street somewhat worse for a whiskey or three and hit his head. Blam, splashed his brains all over the road. A sad end.’ (Pike, p.24)

‘As a girl I had plenty of suitors, but none like Tom. Best behaviour in front of my father, children all brought up in the church by him.’ (p.212)

Stanzi Westaway

‘The parcel is for Stanzi: inside is an old-fashioned coin, dull silver, with a king’s head on one side. It has a silver chain threaded through a hole in the middle. Stanzi looks like she’s about to cry.’ (Alec, p.254)

‘She doesn’t mean to be hurtful. She is worries for me, that’s all … if she really thought I was in terrible trouble, she would be gentler.’ (Charlotte about Stanzi, p.126)

‘the oblivious insouciance of the entitled’ (p.51)

Charlotte Westaway

‘I say the question over and over: should I keep the baby?’ (p.142)

‘The herbs are evidence of an understanding of our place in the universe… an acknowledgement of the delicate balance in our bodies…’ (p.116)

‘There was only one place I could go: my sister’s’ (p.124)

‘They contain all the hopes of the human spirit, all the refusal to quit, to keep believing people can feel better’ (p.116)  

Alec Westaway

‘Yet here I am. Away from home in a world of strangers. Alone. Forgotten.’ (p.241)

‘This waiting for my life to start, it’s driving me mental.’ (p.244)

‘I don’t sketch. Instead I concentrate on the scene the scene in front of me so I can remember it later.’ (p.251)

Libby Westaway

‘All the things I remember, everything about my life, our family, my childhood: it’s all real because Libby knows it too.’ (Alec, p.273)

Jack Hustling

‘I can see both sides.’ (p.80)

‘Just let me kiss you, Connie. I’d die a happy man.’ (p.284)

Ava and Sylvester Husting

‘If we have to send boys to fight … it’s layabout boys with no responsibilities, the Kip Westaway’s of the world, who ought to be going.’ (Ava, p.102)

‘That shilling. Our little secret. Gentlemen’s honour.’ (Sylvester, p.8)

Annabel Crouch

‘You’re a good girl, Annabel.’ (Mr. Crouch, p.177)

‘I’d like to compliment their dresses, but I don’t know what to say.’ (p.190)

Mr. Crouch

‘He is killing himself, I know that. I won’t have him for much longer.’ (Annabel, p.207)

‘No mother, no brothers. Working your youth away, looking after an old man.’ (p.179)

‍

3. Themes, Ideas and Values

Family

Quotes

‘Family house, family suburb, family man’ (Charlotte about Kip, p.140)

‘Stuck here … looking after your old man. You should have a family of your own by now.’ (Mr. crouch to Annabel, pp.178-179)

‘No mother, no brothers. Working your youth away, looking after an old man.’ (p.179)

Analysis

The theme of family is a recurring one that develops over time. Jordan’s inclusion of other families such as the Crouches, the Churches, the McCarthy’s and the Stewarts sand in contrast to the Westaway’s. The juxtaposition of family life in this way allows the reader to see how such factors like wealth, class and reputation can affect the family dynamic especially within the War period. The idea of family is strained by the pressures of war as many family’s sons and husbands where away at was leaving the other members to adopt other roles. Not only physical, but the conventional emotional roles of tradition families of the time are redistributed specifically within the Westaway household. Jordan postulates the role family plays in providing emotional/ physical support is of far greater importance than the necessity to abide to societies idea of what family should look like.  

Women and reproductive rights

Quotes

‘I tell her about shame and the way it’s always the women who wear it. I spare her nothing. I say loose women and no morals and I say bastard and I say slut.’ (Jean, p.220)

‘You don’t have to have it, you know.’ (Stanzi, p.132)

‘Your body, your choice … That’s what our feminist foremothers fought for’ (p.134)

‘What if he wanted to know his child, doesn’t he have the right?’ (pp.133-134)

Analysis

Jordan highlights the controversial issues of premarital sex, abortion and the rights of women within the mid 20th and early 21st century. Indeed, it is this theme of women that becomes inextricably linked with the effect of a damaged reputation. When Connie falls pregnant, Jean implores that she has an abortion, in secret of course, in order to preserve hers and her family’s reputation within the small community.  The issue of abortion is later revisited when Charlotte becomes pregnant in the 1990s, where the contrast between the time periods becomes evident; while unplanned pregnancy is greatly stigmatized in the 1940s, the 1990s offers Charlotte a far wider array of options. It is Jordan’s depiction of the two cases – Connie’s horrific backyard abortion, and Charlotte’s adjustment to parenthood – that she suggests the perceptions and attitudes towards morality, reputation and women have shifted over time, emphasizing the importance of reproductive rights in the development of women.

Masculinity

Quotes

‘I remember coming home from school once, crying. I would have been around six or seven. I was picked last for some team. That was me, the kid without a father.’ (Alec, p.262)

‘”Westaway,” Cooper says. “Get in. For once in your life, do not be a pussy.”’ (p.267)

Analysis

Within the parameters of her text, Jordan articulates how men conform or reject masculine tropes in an effort to fit into society. Toughness, bulling and unsavory activity is presented as the characteristics of man through such depictions a Mac and his gang. In its connection to the war period the novel partly focuses on, the notion that in order to be classified as a man he must first off go through struggle and hardship is presented in the group of strangers taunting Jack, ultimately bullying him into certain ideals of masculinity which prove toxic and consequential: Jack dies as a result. It is Jordan who advocates for a balanced personality of both ‘masculine’ and feminine’ characteristics as suggested in the character development of Kip; evolving, learning and devising a true meaning of what it means to be a man outside its conventional brutality.

Attitudes towards Asia

Quotes

‘She is with a customer or sweeping the floor with a broom made from free-range straw that died of natural causes or singing Kumbaya to the wheatgrass so it id karmically aligned.’ (Stanzi, p.50)

‘The fear of the Nips coming made him a better man.’ (Annabel, p.178)

‘always wanted to go to India [to study yoga] at a proper ashram.’ (pp.132-133)

‘She makes her eyes go big and round like some manga puppy’ (p.264)

Analysis

Through both overt and subtle language, Jordan makes reference to the attitudes towards Asia prevalent at the time, specifically within the war period that sees many Australian’s ‘[fearing]’ the nip’. The derogative slang for the Japanese used represents a lack of understanding and fear (the bombing of Darwin and attack on Sydney left meaning feeling particularly vulnerable to the Japanese). Exacerbated by the fact that Japanese culture was not widely understood and often misrepresented, the Japanese were stereotyped as brutal and inhuman. Over the course of the novel, attitudes towards Asia dramatically shift especially within the early 1990s of Stanzi’s and Charlottes generation. The philosophical ideas of the east are often referenced by characters like Charlotte as she draws on them to make sense of her own complex life. The novel sees another shift in ideology represented through Alec, as his generations perception turns to a more commercial view. Asian culture has earned a place in mainstream media and western life without such gruesome and violent connotations as was previously held during the time of World War.

‍

4. Literary Devices

Allusion

- Throughout her perspective driven text, Jordan makes many references to classic novels that helps create a literary context for the narrative and lends themselves to the evolution of the characters throughout the course of the text.

- Alexandre Dumas’ The Three Musketeers – Kip’s characteristic trait of heroism when he sees the gang waiting for him and says ‘on-bloody-guard, d’Artagnan’ (p.22)

- Charles Dickens’ Great Expectations and Mark Twain’s Huckleberry Finn – both coming-of-age stories about young men struggling within a tough world, only getting by on their wits and strength.

- Brontë sisters Jane Eyre and Wuthering Heights – Their reference is used in discerning a customer’s knowledge on the texts but reveal only a surface level understanding due to the novels carrying a certain cultural value.

- Jonathan Swift’s Gulliver’s Travels – referenced by Jack Husting in relation to his adventures in the country. Its use pertaining to how Jack feels out of place in his home town after leaving a boy and returning a grown man.

Genre

- A historical novel that plays with ideas of placing invented characters into a reconstructed world of the past.

- Uses elements of both realism and impressionism to create the text.

Realist elements:

--- A strong focus on everyday life within a particular society with reference to real historical detail.

--- Incorporates a logical and strong foundation of context that can be easily digested and believed by the reader.

--- Can use an omniscient narrator (all-knowing)

Impressionist elements:

--- Each chapter offers detail and presents a vivid interpretation of specific events.

--- Sensory experiences are emphasized by the use of descriptive and poetic language.

--- The linear flow of the narrative is disrupted by its construction in a non-chronological order, thereby forcing the reader to piece the whole narrative together at the end.

Language

- Varied depending on the character’s perspective and time of perspective

- Language is used to historicise each chapter through use of slang, colloquialisms, formal and proper English.

Setting

- The novel revolves around the Westaway’s family home in Rowena Parade, Richmond over the course of four generations.

- Rather than them move or the location change it evolves, paralleling the growth and evolution undergone by each of the Westaway family members.

Structure

- Inspired by a photograph in the collection of Argus war photos held at the State Library of Victoria, Jordan uses this image capturing a private and intimate moment to establish the premise for each of books chapters.

- Titled Nine Days and composed of nine unique perspectives on life at a given time, Jordan offers insight into the emotional livelihood of each narrator and attaches both intimate and historical significance to their stories. ‍

5. Essay Topics

- Toni Jordan’s Nine Days describes a world in which life in the 1930s and 40s was much harder than life in the 21st century. Do you agree?

- In Nine Days, older Kip’s point of view is very unrealistic. To what extent do you agree?

- Toni Jordan’s Nine Days shows us people can choose whether they end up happy or not. Discuss.

- The mood by the end of Nine Days is ultimately uplifting and positive. Do you agree?

- There is more tragedy in Nine Days than there is joy. To what extent do you agree?

- Nine Days, by Toni Jordan, shows the best and worst of Australian culture. Discuss

- Jordan suggest that appreciation of family is integral to personal happiness. Discuss.

- “Your body, your choice.”

What do the different experiences of Connie and Charlotte reveal about changing societal attitudes towards women?

- There are many characters who are largely hidden figures within the text. What significance is produced in including and excluding different perspectives.

In your English class, you probably feel like your teacher is making stuff up. Moments where you think, “The author can’t possibly have meant that”. To your English teacher, the smallest details have major implications in interpreting the text.

In fact, you probably agree with jokes like this:

The Book: “The curtains were blue.”

What your teacher says: “The curtains represent the character’s depression.”

What the author meant: “The curtains were blue.”

Or even this one...

The disconnect you feel between yourself and the teacher is not just because your teacher is stretching for something to analyse. Whilst the author may have meant something different to what your teacher thinks, this doesn’t mean your teacher is strictly wrong. Context and the author’s intention are two complicated considerations in English, and a whole range of study is dedicated to it. At the VCE level you must consider the context your text was written in, and the author who wrote it, but this shouldn’t hinder your own unique interpretation of the text.

Before you begin reading, I'd highly recommend that you check out our Ultimate Guide to VCE Text Response.

Your interpretation is more important than the author's intention

In 1968, Roland Barthes proposed a theory that has stuck with critics and academics of literature. “The Death of the Author” claimed that the biography, views, or intentions of the author are not a part of the literary object.

The text you are studying in English does not belong to its author, but to the reader, and what the reader decides to make of that text is valid, as long as it is backed up with evidence (as your teacher will say). Barthes’ original essay is complicated, but at a basic level, “The Death of the Author” says that the curtains are not only representative of the character’s depression but could also represent the character’s love of blue orchids.

When we read, we automatically apply our own experiences, biases, and understanding of the world to the text. As such, each person is likely to interpret a text in different ways. This is a major part of studying English, as the critic (you) is more important than the author’s original intention. The fact that a single text can give rise to multiple interpretations is the reason we study English; to debate these interpretations. When you are given an essay topic you are being asked for your opinion on one of these debates, not the author’s opinion on their own work. If you were reading The Fault in Our Stars and claimed it romanticised cancer, you would be participating in the literary debate, despite going against John Green’s original intentions.

In the modern age of mass media, the author is attempting to revive themselves. These are authors who attempt to dictate interpretations of their works after they have been published. The most famous of these is likely J.K. Rowling, author of the Harry Potter series. Rowling’s twitter page adds many pieces to the Harry Potter canon and Rowling offers her own interpretations of the text. To Rowling, her intentions are the only correct ways to interpret her texts, and as such she shares them frequently.

This is not true, however, for any author. Authors are not the be-all-and-end-all when it comes to the interpretation of their texts. Despite having intentions and opinions on their texts, there is also evidence which counters their interpretations.  

When it comes to the debate surrounding the texts you study, you need to remember that the interpretation of the author is only one part of the debate. It is an opinion equal to everyone else involved in the debate. Imagine the author is on trial. They may have an opinion of the crime (or text), but so does the prosecution. You are the jury and must come up with your own interpretation of the crime. Whether it matches up with the author’s intentions or not does not matter, as long as there is supporting evidence within the text.

Context in VCE English

But what about the circumstances in which something was written? Every time you start a new text you are probably asked to research the time in which it was written, or what major political events may be relevant. Unlike the author, these factors are very important in interpreting a text.

For starters, a text may explicitly reference a certain event, and so understanding that event is key to understanding the text. An episode of the Simpsons may make fun of Donald Trump, and the writers assume we have the contextual knowledge to know who Donald Trump is, why he is important, and why the joke is funny. It is easy for us to understand this context because we live in the context.

If you’re studying texts from 200 years ago it becomes harder to interpret because we’re unfamiliar with the context. While you don’t have to know the context of your text perfectly, understanding the cultural beliefs and major events will help you consider the text objectively.

Researching the context of a text acknowledges that literature is a product of the culture and politics of its time. Its themes may still be relevant in the modern age, but it is difficult to fairly judge, critic, and interpret these texts if we do not consider the context in which it was written. A piece of literature will either follow or criticise the views and opinions of the time, and it is the responsibility of the reader to understand these views and determine where the text sits.

Okay, so the text is a reflection of the time from which it stems, and is separate from the author that wrote it? Not quite. Counter to “The Death of the Author”, the author is also a part of context, and this means certain parts of the author should be considered in interpreting a text.

If there is ambiguity in the meaning of a text, the author’s personal beliefs may clear it up. If a character of a certain race is stereotyped and mocked, the meaning of this may change depending on the race of the author. If an author stereotypes their own race, they might be criticising the way other people see them, whereas making fun of a different culture is most likely upholding racist or discriminatory belief systems.

If you're studying VCE Literature, read The Importance of Context in Literature for some further info!

Deriving Meaning From Texts in VCE English

So, what ARE the curtains?! What do they mean? Well, they're a metaphor, representing more than their literal role as curtains. But also, they’re just blue.

The truth is whilst context and the author are relevant, we should try to gain as much from the text as possible before relying on the context to guide our interpretations. While studying your texts, it is reasonable to apply modern standards to your interpretations.

Shakespeare’s plays are a tad sexist, and we’re able to criticise that, despite Shakespeare writing in a different context. For more on studying Shakespeare in VCE, read How to Approach Studying Shakespeare. But it would also be difficult to appreciate the meaning of texts without the context, especially when the text is a response to a major event. At the same time, we’re allowed to expand on what the author has written. We are not confined to what the author meant to say when we interpret texts. As an English student you have the opportunity to consider what each word may represent for the characters and how it influences your unique interpretation.

So, the curtains mean whatever you want them to mean. You can make reasonable assumptions about a text based on the context it comes from and from the author’s life, but you shouldn’t assume that something means nothing. Trivial things like the colour of curtains may not have been important to the author but allow us as English students to analyse and look deeper into the text, its themes, and the psyche of the characters.

In your SACs and exams looking at these small details and deviating from the author’s intentions is an easy way to stand out. Looking to get to that A+ level? Read How to Turn Text Response Essays from Average to A+. So, when your teacher says the curtains are a metaphor, consider what else could be a metaphor, and don’t assume the author has all the answers, or that there is only one interpretation.

After Darkness is currently studied in VCE English under Area of Study 1 - Text Response. For a detailed guide on Text Response, check out our Ultimate Guide to VCE Text Response.

1. Introduction (Plot Summary)

Christine Piper’s historical fiction, ‘After Darkness’ deals with suppressed fragments of the past and silenced memories. The protagonist, Dr Ibaraki attempts to move forward with life whilst also trying to hide past confrontations as well as any remnants of his past wrongdoings and memories. The text consists of three intertwined narrative strands – Ibaraki’s past in Tokyo in 1934, his arrival in Broome in 1938 to work in a hospital there, and his arrival in a detainment camp in Loveday (South Australia) in 1942 after the outbreak of war.

‍

2. Characters and Development

‍

3. Themes

‍

4. Narrative Conventions/Literary Devices

Symbolism:

• ‘a mallee tree’ - Aboriginal word for water which symbolises purity, source of life “if it’s hit by bushfire it grows back from the root with lots of branches, like all the others here. It’s a tough tree. Drought, bushfire…it’ll survive almost anything…I was struck by the ingenuity of the tree in its ability to generate and create a new shape better suited to the environment.”
• The tag with “the character ko…[with] its loop of yellowed string...The knot at the end had left an impression on the page behind it: a small indentation, like a scar.”

Simile/Imagery:

• “Felt like hell on earth”
• “The hollow trunks of dead trees haunted its edges like lost people” - Can also link to the landscape narrative convention
• “The scene was like a photograph, preserving the strangeness of the moment.”

Description of the hospital atmosphere where the patient next to Hayashi laid

• “Only the windows were missing, leaving dark holes like the eyes of an empty soul”
• “The photos reached me first. I leafed through the black and white images: swollen fingers, blistered toes, blackened faces, and grotesque, rotting flesh that shrivelled and puckered to reveal bone. The final photo depicted a child’s chubby hands, the tips of the fingers all black.” - Also foreshadowing death of his and Kayoko’s child

Pathetic Fallacy:

• “That afternoon, the sky darkened, and the wind picked up…making the world outside opaque.”

Allusions:

• Middlemarch (book) which symbolises Ibaraki and Sister Bernice’s friendship as Bernice was left behind
• Robinson Crusoe

Irony:

• “Being able to conduct research in this way has delivered unparalleled knowledge, which we’ve already passed on to the army to minimise further loss of life.”

Language:

• “You haafu fools don’t deserve the Japanese blood in you!”
• “You bloody racist!”
• “You fucking Emperor-worshipping pig...!"
• 'Haafu' - Derogatory, racism term used to define those who are biracial (half Japanese):

- An interpretation of the language use throughout the text could be Piper’s way of humanising the Japanese people to her readers and notifying them that they also have their own culture and form of communication

- Another interpretation of the language use is to show that both the Australians and Japanese are just as cruel as each other because they show no respect to one another and use language in such a brutal way

- Ibaraki represents that divide where he can speak both languages, yet still, cannot voice his own opinion or stand up for himself (link to theme of silence)

Personification:

• “The void seemed to have a force of its own, drawing the meaning of the words into it.”
• “The engine coughed into life.

Foreshadowing:

• “snow was falling as I walked home from the station – the first snow of the season.” - Foreshadowing the storm about to come in his life
• “A black silhouette against the fallen snow.” - Foreshadowing Kayoko’s death

‍

5. Sample Paragraphs

Prompt: “But as soon as you show a part of yourself, almost at once you hide it away.” Ibaraki’s deepest flaw in After Darkness is his failure to reveal himself. Do you agree?

• Introduction

Christine Piper’s historical fiction, After Darkness explores the consequences that an individual will be forced to endure when they choose to conceal the truth from their loved ones. Piper reveals that when a person fails to reveal themselves, it can eventually become a great obstacle which keeps them from creating meaningful and successful relationships. Additionally, Piper asserts that it can be difficult for an individual to confront their past and move completely forward with their present, especially if they believed their actions were morally wrong. Furthermore, Piper highlights the importance of allowing people into one’s life as a means to eliminate the build-up the feelings of shame and guilt.

• Body Paragraph

Piper acknowledges that some people will find it difficult to open up to others about their past due to them accumulating a large amount of regret and guilt over time. This is the case for Ibaraki as he was involved with the ‘experiments’ when he was working in the ‘Epidemic Prevention Labatory,’ in which Major Kimura sternly told him to practise ‘discretion and not talk ‘about [his] work to anybody.’ The inability to confide in his wife or mother after performing illegal and mentally disturbing actions causes him to possess a brusque conduct towards others, afraid that they will discover his truth and ‘not be able to look at [him] at all.’ His failure to confess his past wrongdoings shapes the majority of his life, ruining his marriage and making him feel the need ‘to escape’ from his losses and ‘start afresh.’ He eventually lies to his mother by making her believe that he ‘had gone to Kayoko’s parents’ house’ for the break, avoiding any questions from being raised about his job. As a consequence, he fails to tell his family about his horrid past suggests that he has accepted that ‘[his] life had become one that others whispered about.’ Juxtaposed to Ibaraki’s stress relieving methods, Kayoko confides in her mother after she receives news of her miscarriage, highlighting that when one willingly shares their pain with loved ones, it can release the burden as well as provide them with some assistance. In contrast to this, Ibaraki’s guilty conscience indicates that he will take ‘the secret to his grave,’ making it extremely difficult for people he encounters to understand him and form a meaningful connection with him. Nonetheless, Piper does not place blame on Ibaraki as he was ordered to keep the ‘specimen’ business hidden from society, thereby inviting her readers to keep in mind that some individuals are forced by others to not reveal their true colours for fear of ruining a specific reputation.

• Conclusion

Throughout the journey in After Darkness, Piper engendered that remaining silent about one’s past events that shapes their future is one of the deepest flaws. She notes that for people to understand and form bonds with one another, it is extremely important to reveal their identity as masking it only arises suspicions. Piper postulates that for some, memories are nostalgic; whereas, for others it carries an unrelenting burden of guilt, forcing them to hide themselves which ultimately becomes the reason as to why they feel alone in their life.

‍

6. Some additional prompts or analysis questions to consider

• Analyse the role of silence in After Darkness. Compare the ways in which the characters in the text utilise or handle silence. What is Piper suggesting about the notion of silence?
• Discuss the importance of friendship in the text. What is it about friends that make the characters appear more human? How can friendship bolster development in one’s character?
• Racism and nationalism are prominent themes in the text. How are the two interlinked? Explore the ways they are shown throughout the text and by different characters. Is Piper indicating that the two always lead to negative consequences?
• Analyse some of the narrative conventions (imagery, simile, metaphor, symbols, motifs, landscapes, language, etc.) in the novel and what they mean to certain characters and to the readers.
• Explore the ways in which the text emphasises that personal conscience can oftentimes hold people back from revealing their true thoughts and feelings.
• Character transformation (bildungsroman) is prevalent throughout the text. What is Piper suggesting through Ibaraki’s character in terms of the friendships and acquaintances he has formed and how have they impacted him? How have these relationships shaped him as a person in the past and present? Were such traits he developed over time beneficial for himself and those around him or have they caused the destruction of once healthy relationships?

‍

7. Tips

• Be sure to read as many academic articles as you can find in relation to the text in order to assist you with in depth analysis when writing your essays. This will help you to stand out from the crowd and place you in a higher standing compared to your classmates as your ideas will appear much more sophisticated and thought-out.
• Being clear and concise with the language choices is such a crucial factor. Don’t over complicate the ideas you are trying to get across to your examiners by incorporating ‘big words’ you believe will make your writing appear of higher quality, because in most cases, it does the exact opposite. Be careful! It is best that your examiners know what you’re talking about and have a lower vocabulary level than a high vocabulary level, but your examiner has no clue what you are writing. But if you can, try to find that balance between the two.
• If there is a quote in the prompt, be sure to embed the quote into analysis, rather than making the quote its own sentence. You only need to mention this quote once in the entire essay.

When Lisa suggested that I blog about what teachers want in their students my immediate response was “Don’t we all want the same things!” We want our students to exhibit the insight and dedication that signals a top class learner. Additionally, it is obvious that teachers want students who are interested in the subject. Interested students make interesting lessons.

However, in my pondering on this question I have realised that for me students who are willing to engage with the text and commit to the task are always preferable.

Especially in English your teachers are looking for your willingness to explore your own ideas rather than rehash what others think. Your fresh perspective is welcome in a world where it’s all been said before… (and again!)

Another thing I like to find in a student is a unique style. There’s something sincere and credible about writing that speaks with its own distinct timbre, its individual structure and its authentic voice. This is the sort of writing that has you wanting to read on rather than doggedly plodding along to the end wishing that they had stuck to the lower word limit.

I can be a touch (*ahem*) pedantic and traditional in my views. I mean I love a page that is neatly written in a legible well-formed hand. There’s no chance of missing your meaning when your teacher can see what you’re saying. And something I instil in my students if they have not come to me already equipped with it is the ability to write on alternate lines only – I need a place to comment. You need a place to edit and this layout guards against sensory overload for your marker. Being willing to pay attention to apparently trivial details like this is the difference between a good student and a top student.

‍

10 popular questions from VCE students answered by a VCE teacher

1. My teacher says I have problems with my expression. What can I do to fix this?

Lisa has already posted one of the best ways to fix your expression: that is to read it aloud. The natural rhythms of your expression will be clearer to you and you will find that your ‘mouth’ often makes corrections as you articulate your prose.

Another excellent way to find your voice is to read quality writing. Make it a habit to read a few pages every day. You can use the books on the VCE reading lists, you can go to your local library, find classics online and look at the opinion columns in the city newspapers. The more you read the better you will be at phrasing your ideas succinctly.

2. Teachers often say, “you need to develop your essay more”. What does this really mean?

This means that you look beyond what the topic statement or prompt demands that you address and explore what it invites you to consider.

Too many students are content to skim along the surface of the text. Take a deep breath and dive right into the depths of the ideas and points of views that are proposed in each text.

Formulate your own ideas and then develop them: explain and elaborate. Pick a thematic concern in one of your texts and follow its progress through the text; that way you will understand it with greater awareness of the author’s intentions.

3. In regards to Text Response, should students be ready to write on both their texts for the exam?

I would encourage students to be prepared for both texts. Apart from the extra analysis practice you get by preparing for both texts, you can never be 100% sure that you have adequately covered all options for the type of reading and responding topic you may face.

However, if you know your text intimately, if you have explored its nuances thoroughly and are so familiar with its narrative that it’s like your best friend then, yes, going into the exam with the plan of responding to one text will be possible.

4. Is it important to make my essay ‘sound’ good by using ‘sophisticated’ language?

One of the criteria for a successful response and a regularly commented upon aspect of a successful essay is your ability to show “strong language skills”.

Having a broad vocabulary base – a word bank – will enable you to express your ideas fluently and with eloquence. Additionally, used appropriately (no Malapropisms please like the student who wrote that “parents these days pamper to their children’s every desire”) some sophisticated words will add gloss to your piece. Think of BIG words as the seasoning of your essay – there to enhance, to titillate your reader to continue, not to overpower her. This is definitely a case where  “less is more”. A little advanced vocabulary adds depth and interest; too much and meaning is sacrificed to effect.

5. In regards to Writing in Context, which is the easiest form to score well in? (for example: short story, essay, poem, speech etc.)

Note: This question is no longer relevant to the current English study design.

No one form is easier than another – it depends on the strength of the individual student. Find your strengths and cater to them. Perhaps you are skilled at taking a stance and validating that position with reasoned and logical rhetoric. If so then you should consider a form of the persuasive genre. If you are an adept storyteller with a flair for creating believable characters then opt for a type of creative response.

The way to excel is more about your authenticity as a writer rather than the type of text you produce. 

6.In regards to Writing in Context, would it be best to stick to a conventional essay structure or write  in the form of a hybrid? (for example, merging creative with expository writing.)

Note: This question is no longer relevant to the current English study design.

This reminds me of how subjective the marking process can be. I’m not a fan of hybrids, although according to the assessors’ comments there have been some successful results by students who choose to take this approach.

I think the hybrid type of response is better suited to the practiced, confident and polished writers amongst you.

Again, your score won’t depend on the form in which you decide to write your piece but on the degree to which you satisfy the criteria.

7. How should I prepare for the exam?

You should prepare for the exam by reading and rereading, watching and watching again, thinking and challenging those thoughts. You should do this until you come to a point where you know the text so thoroughly that you are equipped with enough knowledge about the text to enable you to respond to any topic with finesse.

You should discuss the texts with your friends, your fellow students, your teachers and your tutors.

You should look at study guides and compare your ideas to those you find in the many guides available.

You should brainstorm topics and write some full-length essays under exam conditions.

8. During the exam, ideally which essays should be approached first, second and last, and why?

There’s no set way of doing the exam. Some students like to attack the part of the exam that they are most confident about first – that can save valuable time for the more challenging section. Do it the way that you feel more comfortable with.

Others find it more useful to do the hardest first and get it out of the way. One successful student I know wrote half of each essay in order and then went back and finished each. Only attempt this approach if you are super confident about your voice and your capability for each section.

9. How can I avoid ‘retelling the plot’?

Only tell the story when it is essential for explanation and elaboration. A great tip was passed on to me by a student who attends one of the bigger boys schools: to test if you are telling the story see how many of your sentences express an opinion – the key word here is opinion, obviously.

Assume that your teachers and markers know the text and use the events from your selected novels, plays or films to validate your ideas. You are required to make relevant textual reference in your discussion as a means of evidencing your thoughts, so you cannot omit all elements of the narrative – just be fussy about what you include.

10. How can I make my conclusions more interesting?

A conclusion should be just what its name implies – it should show the position that you have reached having explored the topic (question, statement, media text). One of the most tedious ways to conclude is the one in which you summarise what you have already written. Another no-no is the restatement of your introduction.

You should make your conclusion show what you have deduced after your exploration of the required task. It is appropriate and useful to comment on authorial message in the conclusion. Just this one amendment from the tired old approach will raise your score.

This guide was written by a past VCE teacher who wishes to remain anonymous. Thank you ‘VF’ for your expert advice!

The following blog post (updated 02/10/2020), is a mix of the video transcription, along with some new pieces of advice and tips. Happy learning!

‍

[Video Transcription]

Hey guys. Welcome back to Lisa's Study Guides.

Right now, it's in the middle of December, and I know that most of you should have finished school by now, and you're enjoying your school holidays. Because it is summer holidays, and most people aren't really studying right now, this is for the truly keen beans, the people who are reading the text before the school starts, which, by the way, you should be doing. I'll pop that video in a card up above and so if you are studying Burial Rites, then this video is for you. If you're not, as always, it doesn't really matter because the type of advice that I will be giving would definitely be relevant to any text, because it's more about your thinking and how you actually go around approaching essay topics.
‍

Summary

‍
Burial Rites is about this girl called Agnes, and she is the last person in Iceland to be sentenced to the life sentence. This book covers the last few months of her life, living with these people who she's sharing her story with. She has been sentenced because she has murdered Natan. And although we first initially hear that she has murdered this guy, when we start to hear her story develop, that's when we start to see that there are shades of gray. That she did have reason behind what she did, and you can start to feel quite sympathetic towards her. At the same time, though, and this is what today's essay question will be about. There's a lot to do with the patriarchy. Agnes being not just a woman, but an intelligent woman, was something that was looked down upon, and people were scared of that. That's just to give you a little bit of context so that we can start this essay topic.
‍

Essay Topic

‍
Today's chosen essay topic is:

Women have no power in Burial Rites, the patriarchy dominates their lives. To what extent do you agree?

‍
Step 1: Analyse

‍
The first step, as always, is we look at keywords. What are the keywords here? To me, they are women, no power, patriarchy and dominates. These words really stand out to me, and these are the words that I feel are necessary for me to focus on in order to answer this prompt properly.

The second step that I do is I define keywords. So what I do here is I try to understand what the keywords mean and also their implications.

• Women, is our first keyword. it's easy just to say, "Oh, women includes this character and this character." But we can start to think about more so the implications as well. So don't just think about the major characters like Agnes and Margret, but also think about the minor characters like Sigga and Rosa.
• No power. So to me, no power means to lack freedom. It's not necessarily no power like you know I'm not strong and this is why we need to actually define the words because many words have multiple connotations or they have multiple meanings. So you need to figure out, "Okay, how am I going to find this word so that I've got the right focus for the rest of my essay?" This is silly, but what if you, halfway through your essay, went, "Holy crap, power could also mean electricity, and I didn't talk about electricity." So electricity is not part of Burial Rites, but it's just something to get you thinking. You know you don't just want to dive straight into the essay, assuming you know what the keyword means and what it entails. Actually spend time to define it, so that it's a lot clearer for you, too. So I've also added that no power means a lack of power compared to men. So because it is a patriarchy, the fact that they have no power is very much sort of linked to the fact that it's male-induced.
• The third keyword is a patriarchy, so a male-dominated society, which means that an analysis of male characters is also required to fully understand male and female interactions. If you have an essay where you only talk about the women, then you're maybe only answering it 50%. To really add extra value to what you're saying and to really solidify your points, talk about the men because everyone influences each other one way or another.
• The last thing is I would also add, 'to what extent'? When a prompt says, "to what extent?" to me, it means that some sort of challenge is required here. It's probably not enough if I just completely agree with it because it's only suggesting that the extent does end somewhere and that you need to go beyond it.

Step 2: Brainstorm

While in this video I don't cover the brainstorm process, you can learn more by reading up on my THINK and EXECUTE strategy, which has helped thousands of students achieve better marks!
‍

Step 3: Create a Plan

‍
My third step is I plan out key arguments. So this is how I'm going to break down this essay prompt. I am going to do two body paragraphs where I agree and one body paragraph where I disagree. So this should mean that I'm only agreeing to a certain extent. Here's a video about this type of essay structure and response:

‍
Body paragraph 1:

So my first body paragraph is yes, under male authority, the women are robbed of freedom and power. My example for that would be Agnes, who is the protagonist. She is a woman who's being sentenced to death for murdering Natan, more about him later, and, as a result, society condemns her and she's robbed of her identity and freedom. "Everything I said was altered until the story wasn't my own." The metaphor of a story represents her being stripped of her experiences and identity, and instead replaced with how others think of her, whore, madwoman and murderess.
‍

Body paragraph 2:

My second body paragraph would be another agreement, but this time I'm going to focus on the men. In this second body paragraph, my argument is men hold exploitative power over women. One, Natan, the person who was murdered, toys with all his whores, demonstrating male dominance in 1820s Iceland. All his workmaids are stranded, shipwrecked with nowhere else to go, highlighting women's hopelessness in changing their situation. Additionally, there's Blondal. So Blondal is a government authority and he's torn when commanding Lauga, Lauga, not too sure how to say that. You guys let me know. "I'm sure you would not question me," which is also another example of women's subordinate status.

Body paragraph 3:

The third one is one where I disagree. Here will be that there are rare instances of female empowerment in the novel. The first one will be Rosa, the poet. So Rosa has an affair with Natan, but Kent praises Rosa and she's described to be a wonderful woman and beautiful. Rosa transcends patriarchal structures, as she is assertive, headstrong, going against social codes in an act of female empowerment.

The second one will be Agnes. Her storytelling and ability to express what she is inside allows her to gain a voice in the patriarchal world that has silenced her. Through her storytelling, she asserts her self-worth and dignity and despite the fact that she has been locked down, she is being treated like crap by the men, her ability to hold herself strong and to be able to face her death with dignity means that with some sense, at least from within, that sense of empowerment has not been completely diminished.

‍

If you found this blog and video helpful, and would like to see Burial Rites essay writing in action, then I recommend you check out How To Write A Killer Text Response below!